cream tea and incest

writer: BENJAMIN ALBOROUGH / director: BENJAMIN PHILIPP
10 - 28 April
7:45pm
£15/£12
Tues to Sat only. No show Sun/Mon.

“Remember what it says in the bible: aim for the stomach and he’ll bleed heavily but won’t die straight away.”

Romance! Adventure! Murder! Aristocrat Eddie Spangler and valet Jeffrey must learn the meaning of these words and more in this new knockabout Edwardian comedy. Delight in their capers, mix-ups, and the dead bodies left in their wake.

We follow Eddie Spangler, an incompetent but optimistic Englishman and his loyal valet, Jeffrey, as a simple matchmaking quest quickly deteriorates into a race against time when the Machiavellian forces of the aristocracy move to wreak their vengeance. Lord Wiggins is set to inherit Rhodesia upon his marriage to Emily Rhodes, but their romance is faltering. It is up to Eddie and Jeffrey to sort Wiggins out as quickly and violently as possible. Meanwhile – the evil Lord Biggins lurks in the shadows, waiting to execute dark schemes of his own…

From a sell-out run at the 2017 Edinburgh Festival Fringe comes the world’s first 2.5 dimensional show set in a world where every prop and set piece is made out of cardboard. Think The Play That Goes Wrong meets Jeeves and Wooster meets Diary of a Nobody with a little bit of American Psycho thrown in for good measure.

“A gem of a play”
★★★★ Broadway Baby

“Scarcely a dry eye in the house”
Highly Recommended Show – Fringe Review

“The most impressive and creative use of cardboard I’ve ever seen”
★★★★★ Lexical Lunacy

Box Office opens at 7.00pm for cash sales and collection of pre-booked tickets. The performance lasts one hour without interval and contains strong language. No re-admittance once the performance has commenced.

LATECOMERS CANNOT BE ADMITTED UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. PLEASE ARRIVE IN GOOD TIME FOR THE START TIME OF 7.45PM.

Over 18s only. Due to pub licensing laws no one under the age of 18 is permitted into the building after 7pm.

Refunds and ticket exchanges are not available. 

uncle vanya

23 Apr - 11 May 2019

Tales Retold presents Uncle Vanya by Anton Chekhov. An abridged version based on Brendan Murray’s adaptation directed by James Stone. When Vanya’s brother-in-law returns to the family home, his new wife becomes an unwitting, destabilising influence. A passionate crescendo of domestic turbulence ensues, plunging the estate into a bitter existential crisis.

getting over everest

28 & 29 Apr

GETTING OVER EVEREST is an original comedy, following Libby’s journey into singledom after she is unexpectedly dumped by her boyfriend of 10 years. A unique female-led production combining monologue storytelling, ensemble, character comedy and the ultimate breakup playlist. 

testament

14 May - 1 Jun 2019

In the beginning God created the heavens and earth and… Max! After a car crash, Max questions what happened to Tess. Answers appear as apparitions of biblical characters, aiding Max in his discovery or tempting him away. His only hope of recovery lies in the hands of his brother Chris.

sexy lamp

26 & 27 May

“And so I figured if McDonald’s can call itself a restaurant, I can call myself an actor”
SEXY LAMP, Show of the Week at VAULT 2019, is a one-woman comedy with songs that follows Katie as she tries to shed some light on the shady acting industry. Katie trained at drama school so she can audition for ground-breaking roles including “dead girlfriend” and “restaurant slut”.

cuttings

4 - 22 June

YouTuber turned actor Arthur Moses wins an Olivier Award, and goes onto drunkenly deliver the most offensive, outrageous and profanity laden speech in the ceremony’s history.
His publicists have quite a morning ahead of them.
CUTTINGS is a satirical look at fandom, fame and being ‘sorry’ in the 21st Century.

the censor

25 Jun - 13 Jul

Female-led RoundPeg Theatre brings Anthony Neilson’s controversial play to London for the first time in 15 years. A female pornographer comes face to face with a censor – the man whose job it is to determine whether her work can see the light of day.

A tender, graphic exploration into sex, pleasure and taboo.

booking:
telephone bookings:
0333 666 3366
(booking fees apply, fees for telephone sales will be higher)